My life shifted a lot this last year; I become a mother and lost my father only a few months apart.
Here is something that struck me after my dad’s Celebration of Life.
First, some backstory. My dad was an incredibly successful carpenter and commercial contractor. He built a substantial company that did a large volume of business. He dedicated a huge part of his young life to building that company and again saving it in the recession of 2008, right when he was supposed to be retiring.
We estimated about 400 people came to his Celebration of Life.
Old friends from high school, people he had done business with, hunting buddies, fishing buddies, and community members who respected him.
We were genuinely overwhelmed by the turnout.
Now here is the lesson.
Not a single person talked about my dad being a good carpenter.
No one told stories about days in the office.
No one said “Carl never missed a day of work” or
“That guy was the first one in and the last to leave.”
Instead, we heard stories about his infamous Thursday night BBQs, where Madera employees, lumber salesmen, office neighbors, and friends all came together to eat tri tip and have a beer.
We heard so many hunting stories.
Stories of his generosity.
Jokes about his hilarious “Carl-isms”.
And laughs. So many laughs.
People talked about how he made them feel.
They commented on who he was outside of work.
And everyone, even if they initially knew him through business, knew him outside of work.
For goodness sake, one of my dad’s dearest friends, Jim Justice, started as a stranger sitting next to him at the airport.
I offer this advice as a recruiter and as someone who has spent a lot of my life hustling to further my career: Have a life outside of work.
Work as much as you must, but don’t let work be your life.
You can build something incredible, and yet people will only remember how you made them feel.
Your boss will not stand up and your funeral and comment that you never took a vacation day.
Your family will not thank you for never taking a sick day.
Your life must exist beyond the boundaries of your work.
Take your vacation.
Use your sick days.
Take time to do what you love.
Those are the stories that will have people laughing through tears at your funeral one day.